Today the new Sex and the City movie comes out. I may or may not have watched this show back in the day when it was on HBO, and I also may or may not believe that it was a good show. Aaaaand I may or may not totally want to go see this movie...
However....
Sarah Jessica Parker looks like a horse
Have a good weekend!!
Friday, May 30, 2008
Friday Game Review - Tecmo Super Bowl
There's so much to love about Tecmo Super Bowl, but mention the game to anyone, and I guarantee the first thing they think of is this:
And really, what more does one need to say?
Not a hell of a lot, but indulge me...
Since Tecmo Bowl came out:
The NFL adopted the 2 point conversion. The play clock was reduced from 45 seconds to 40. Kickoffs were moved back from the 35 yard line to the 30. "K" balls were introduced. C
hange of possession after missed field goals was moved from the line of scrimmage to the point of the kick. The NFL changed from a three toed, two inch kicking tee to a circular one inch tee. The Instant Replay experiment was abandoned, adopted as an experiment again after a hiatus, and then made permanent. Radios were added to the helmets of quarterbacks, and will be added to one defensive player in 2008. Also, in 2008, coaches will finally be allowed to "defer" the choice of receiving to the second half. Practically every video game released from the time TSB came out to now has allowed you to do this. Every single one of them has had the rule wrong. Dozens of rules have been changed to protect the quarterback and promote passing offense, and the Chicago Bears still believe "power running" is the way to win in the NFL.The NFL draft contracted from 12 rounds to 8, and then from 8 to 7. The NFL added an extra bye week, the canceled the experiment after only one year. The NFL negotiated a new collective bargaining agreement with the players association, extended the agreement four times, then formed another new agreement. The NFL introduced the Salary Cap, which was originally set at $34.6 million. For the 2008 season the cap is $116.7 million. Paul Tagliabue retired as NFL commissioner and was replaced by Roger Goodell. The NFL, after many false starts, created the World Football league, later renamed it NFL Europe, then NFL Europa, then folded the league.
The NFL created their own television network and has begun broadcasting select games on it, beginning with a third game on Thanksgiving Day. The NFL moved from CBS, NBC, ABC, ESPN and TNT; to NBC, Fox, ABC, ESPN and TNT; then to Fox, CBS, ESPN and ABC; then to Fox, CBS, NBC and ESPN. Monday Night Football went from being the premier game of the week to an afterthought, and Sunday Night Football made the exact opposite transition. Comedian Dennis Miller had a stint as a color commentator.
The NFL expanded from 28 to 32 teams, adding the Panthers and Jaguars. Moved the Oilers to Nashville an
d renamed them the Titans. Turned the Browns into the expansion Baltimore Ravens, "rebooted" the Browns in Cleavland, and added the Texans in Houston. The NFL realigned from 3 divisions per conference to four, and the Seattle Seahawks moved from the AFC to the NFC. The Rams and Raiders both moved out of Los Angeles. The Vikings have threatened to move to San Antonio and Los Angeles, the Saints have threatened to move anywhere and everywhere, as long as it's of New Orleans. The Phoenix Cardinals rebranded themselves as the Arizona Cardinals.The Bucs, Broncos and Patriots got completely new uniforms and logos. The Giants, Jets, and Chargers changed their uniforms to make them look more like their old uniforms. The Rams, 49ers, Dolphins, Vikings, Bills, Lions, Seahawks, Bengals, Cardinals, Falcons, and Eagles all made varying degrees of cosmetic changes to their uniforms and/or logos. Practically every team in the league added a 3rd "alternate" jersey.
The record for the longest play in NFL history was set after a missed field goal was returned 107 yards by Chris McAllister. In three consecutive years it was broken by Nathan Vasher who returned a missed field goal 108 yards, tied by Devin Hester on another missed field goal, and then broken for the final time ever by Antonio Cromartie who returned a missed field goal 109 yards.
Astroturf claimed both of Wendell Davis's knees, and a decade or so later was done away with, replaced with synthetic field turf. The Bears completely renovated Solider Field. The Seahawks, Falcons, Browns, Bengals, Lions, Patriots, Titans, Broncos, Cardinals, Bucs, Steelers, Eagles, Rams, Panthers and Redskins moved into new facilities. The Jaguars, and Texans began their franchise life with new, state of the art facilities. The Colts will join that group this season, the Cowboys next season. In either the pre season or the regular season, the Bears were the first opponent of the Browns, Bucs, Panthers and Ravens in their new stadiums, they lost all four games.
Matt Millen won a super bowl as a Washington Redskin, retired, did color commentary for CBS, and got hired as Lions GM. The Lions have posted a record of 31 and 81 under his leadership. They endured an 0-24 road record over his first three seasons, and have won just eight since. The have not won more than seven games in a single season. Mil
len drafted four wide receivers with first round picks in five years, two of those receivers are out of the NFL. He also selected Kevin Jones and Joey Harrington with first round picks. Matt Millen is the second highest paid General Manager in the NFL and the Fords have shown no indication that his job is in Jeopardy.Joe Gibbs retired as head coach of the Washington Redskins, started his own NASCAR racing team, took twelve years off from Pro Football, returned to coach the team for four more seasons, then retired again.
Jut Jaw Bill Cowher was named Head Coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers. He coached for fifteen seasons, posting a record of 149-90-1. The Steelers made the playoffs ten times while he was coach. He won three "coach of the year" awards and one Super Bowl. Cowher has since retired from his job coaching the Steelers. He was replaced by Omar Epps.
Brett Favre was drafted by the Atlanta Falcons and traded to the Green Bay Packers where he started the next 253
straight regular season games and threw 8,758 passes for 5,377 completions, 61,655 yards, 442 touchdowns, 288 interceptions and at least three touchdowns in 63 games. He won 3 NFL AP-MVP awards and 160 games. Every single one of those statistics is the all time NFL record for quarterbacks.When TSB was released Jerry Rice had 79 touchdown receptions and 7,866 yards. He added 119 more touchdowns and 15,029 yards. Both first all time Receiving and from scrimmage. He left the 49ers, resurrected his career as a Raider, petered out with the Seahawks and Broncos, and then signed a one day contract to retire with the 49ers.
When TSB was released, Emmitt Smith had rushed for 987 yards and 11 touchdowns as a Rookie. He added 17,418 yards
and 153 more touchdowns. Both of these are fist all time rushing, and second all time to only Rice from scrimmage.
Mike Tomczak, Jim Harbaugh, Peter Tom Willis, Will Furrer, Steve Walsh, Erik Kramer, Steve Stenstrom, Moses Moreno, Cade McNown, Dave Kreig, Rick Meier, Shane Matthews, Jim Miller, Chris Chandler, Henry Burris, Kordell Stewart, Rex Grossman, Jonathan Quinn, Craig Krenzel, Steve Hutchinson, Kyle Orton, and Brian Griese started at Quarterback for the Chicago Bears.
Junior Seau, John Carney, Jeff Feagles, and Morton Anderson all finished the 2008 season on an NFL roster. They are the only remaining active players from the TSB roster.
TSB vets Smith, Rice, Mike Singletary, Anthony Munoz, Lawrence Taylor, Eric Dickerson, Howie Long, Ronnie Lott, Dan Hampton, Joe Montana, Jim Kelly, Marcus Allen, James Lofton, John Elway, Barry Sanders, Dan Marino, Steve Young, Troy Aikmin, Warren Moon, Reggie White, Michael Irvin, Bruce Matthews, Gary Zimmerman, Andre Tippett, Darrell
Green, Jackie Slater, Mike Webster, Ozzie Newsom, Mike Munchak, Thurman Thomas, and Art Monk have been inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame.John Madden was an analyst on at least 275 NFL broadcasts for CBS, Fox, ABC, and NBC. John Madden Football was first released on a home video game system. The seires was renamed Madden NFL. Seventeen full, annual sequels have been released across the Super Nintendo, Genesis, 3DO, Game Gear, Game Boy, Sega Saturn, Sony Playstation, Windows PC, Nintendo 64, Game Boy Color, Game Boy Advance, Sony Playstation 2, Microsoft Xbox, Nintendo Gamecube, Nintendo DS, Sony PSP, Xbox 360, Nintendo Wii, Sony Playstation 3, and your Cell Phone.
None of them were better than Tecmo Super Bowl.
Tecmo Super Bowl is still my favorite football game of all time. It's hard to even type this, let alone actuaually believe it, but
when the game was released in 1990, it was one of the most realistic football video games. The game had full starting rosters with real players thanks to the NFLPA license, allowed you to sub in offensive backups, had injuries, trick plays, customizable playbooks (something that plays heavily into the strategy of the game, even today.)Of course, it also allowed you to break nearly unlimited tackles with the right running back in the right condition, let you throw the ball 120 yards in the air for a touchdown, and allowed seven blitzers to reach the quarterback untouched. Tipped passes could not be caught. You couldn't switch control of players after the snap on defense. There was a button to tackle, and a button to "graple" but no button to tip passes. There were no spin moves, no jukes, no stiff arms, no stutter step. No way to lower your shoulder, no way to lateral. Players didn't have momentum and gue
ss what, it's still more fun than any football "sim."Tecmo Super Bowl is still played in dorm rooms, frat houses, bachelor pads, and mom's basements. Tournaments are still played online on PCs with emulators. Mods have been released that have updated the rosters almost every year since the early 2000s.
If you were born between 1975 and 1985 or thereabouts, you know why this game is relevant, you also know it's GREAT. People who don't play video games play Tecmo Super Bowl. Tecmo Bo Jackson is on the record as saying he is asked more about Tecmo Super Bowl than any of his career accomplishments. I don't know if I'll be playing Halo 3 or Grand Theft Auto IV ten years from now, I KNOW I won't be playing Madden 08, but I know I'll still play Tecmo Super Bowl, it's pure, distilled fun.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
In Which Bellwether Meltdown Ranks Chicago Play By Play Announcers
Ok, keep in mind, I'm in my early 20s, so Vince Lloyd, Lou Boudreau, Milo Hamilton, et. al. will not be on this list. Also, this is Play By Play announcers NOT analists, that's why Steve Stone isn't on here.
When I rank play by play guys, the most important thing to me is the sound of their voice. It's not just tenor either. Pacing, patter, phrasing, how the words roll out of their mouth is just important. Second is how good they are at as technical announcers. If I'm listening to the game on the radio, how much of the game can I see. If I watching on TV, how well do their descriptions match up with what I actually see. Third most important is their excitement, how well do they bring me into the game, how well do they contain themselves from going over the top (Chip Caray, I'm looking at you.)
1) Wayne Larrivee
Wayne Larrivee is the voice I hear in my head when I imagine football. His radio call is play by play perfection. People criticize him for being a screamer, but I don't think I've ever heard Wayne yell in a situation that didn't deserve it. There are two things that make Wayne great, however. His description of formations and specific on field events, and that all important sound of his voice. Both are incredible on their own, but it's the way Wayne pairs the two that makes it so special.
"Conway Wide Left, Graham' wide' to' the' right, Timpson the slot' receiver on the right side, off'set I' behind Kramer" the patter and pacing of the description is fantastic. The wild hyperbolic exclamations were hilarious. ESCORTED TO THE CHALKMARKS.... FAVRE HAD ENOUGH TIME TO READ WAR AND PEACE IN THE POCKET... DIETRICH JELLS OF ALL PEOPLE RUNNING 50 YARDS DOWNFIELD LIKE JERRY RICE!
2) John Wiedeman
No, really. I know it's sacrosanct to say anything bad about Pat Foley in this town, but the fact is, Pat Foley, though very exciting, is a very difficult listen on the radio, it's very hard to follow the action on a Foley broadcast. Weideman has the same vocal qualities as Foley, brings the same level of excitement and gives you a technically competent broadcast. Wiedeman is just so solid all around. Also, Foley's a jerk, but that's another blog entry.
3) Pat Hughes
First of all, a million bonus points for actually making a Ron Santo broadcast worth listening to, but even aside from that, Pat's great. He gives you a rock solid call, knows when to get excited, knows when to shut up. His voice is amazing, he's a great storyteller (so important in baseball when there's 15-25 seconds between every pitch) and he's excellent at painting the picture. His long, list style descriptions are easy to poke fun of, but they're still entertaining and give you a great mental image.
4) Jim Durham
Only this low because I didn't hear much of him. He's probably the most recognizable voice on the list as he went on to work for ESPN. His descriptions are excellent, his voice is instantly recognizable
5) Harry Caray with the White Sox
Wasn't around, but the few tapes I've heard have been legendary.
6) Harry Caray with the Cubs
I got to hear the last 6-7 years of this. Harry and Steve was a special broadcast, but Harry was clearly losing it the last 5 years or so. The technical imperfections hurt this team, but it still holds a special place in my heart.
7) Pat Foley
Ok, fine. Wiedeman's still better, but it'll be great to have Foley (or hell anyone besides Dan Kelly) doing Hawks games on TV next season.
8) John Rooney
I wish I'd have listened to more Sox games on the radio pre 2006, I'm sure if I had, I'd have Rooney much higher. He made Ed Farmer tolerable, which while not as impressive as making a Santo broadcast enjoyable, is no slight feat in it's own right.
9) Jack Brickhouse
Ok I'm sure he's probably #1 if you're over the age of 45, but all I can go on are a few highlights. I get it, I do, but I wasn't around for it so it wasn't special to me. Brickhouse is most famous for annoucing the Cubs, but he also called games for the Bears, Bulls and White Sox, announced pro wrestling, and several national broadcasts, including the famous Willie Mays "Basket Catch" in the 1954 world series at the Polo Grounds.
When I rank play by play guys, the most important thing to me is the sound of their voice. It's not just tenor either. Pacing, patter, phrasing, how the words roll out of their mouth is just important. Second is how good they are at as technical announcers. If I'm listening to the game on the radio, how much of the game can I see. If I watching on TV, how well do their descriptions match up with what I actually see. Third most important is their excitement, how well do they bring me into the game, how well do they contain themselves from going over the top (Chip Caray, I'm looking at you.)
1) Wayne Larrivee
Wayne Larrivee is the voice I hear in my head when I imagine football. His radio call is play by play perfection. People criticize him for being a screamer, but I don't think I've ever heard Wayne yell in a situation that didn't deserve it. There are two things that make Wayne great, however. His description of formations and specific on field events, and that all important sound of his voice. Both are incredible on their own, but it's the way Wayne pairs the two that makes it so special.
"Conway Wide Left, Graham' wide' to' the' right, Timpson the slot' receiver on the right side, off'set I' behind Kramer" the patter and pacing of the description is fantastic. The wild hyperbolic exclamations were hilarious. ESCORTED TO THE CHALKMARKS.... FAVRE HAD ENOUGH TIME TO READ WAR AND PEACE IN THE POCKET... DIETRICH JELLS OF ALL PEOPLE RUNNING 50 YARDS DOWNFIELD LIKE JERRY RICE!
2) John Wiedeman
No, really. I know it's sacrosanct to say anything bad about Pat Foley in this town, but the fact is, Pat Foley, though very exciting, is a very difficult listen on the radio, it's very hard to follow the action on a Foley broadcast. Weideman has the same vocal qualities as Foley, brings the same level of excitement and gives you a technically competent broadcast. Wiedeman is just so solid all around. Also, Foley's a jerk, but that's another blog entry.
3) Pat Hughes
First of all, a million bonus points for actually making a Ron Santo broadcast worth listening to, but even aside from that, Pat's great. He gives you a rock solid call, knows when to get excited, knows when to shut up. His voice is amazing, he's a great storyteller (so important in baseball when there's 15-25 seconds between every pitch) and he's excellent at painting the picture. His long, list style descriptions are easy to poke fun of, but they're still entertaining and give you a great mental image.
4) Jim Durham
Only this low because I didn't hear much of him. He's probably the most recognizable voice on the list as he went on to work for ESPN. His descriptions are excellent, his voice is instantly recognizable
5) Harry Caray with the White Sox
Wasn't around, but the few tapes I've heard have been legendary.
6) Harry Caray with the Cubs
I got to hear the last 6-7 years of this. Harry and Steve was a special broadcast, but Harry was clearly losing it the last 5 years or so. The technical imperfections hurt this team, but it still holds a special place in my heart.
7) Pat Foley
Ok, fine. Wiedeman's still better, but it'll be great to have Foley (or hell anyone besides Dan Kelly) doing Hawks games on TV next season.
8) John Rooney
I wish I'd have listened to more Sox games on the radio pre 2006, I'm sure if I had, I'd have Rooney much higher. He made Ed Farmer tolerable, which while not as impressive as making a Santo broadcast enjoyable, is no slight feat in it's own right.
9) Jack Brickhouse
Ok I'm sure he's probably #1 if you're over the age of 45, but all I can go on are a few highlights. I get it, I do, but I wasn't around for it so it wasn't special to me. Brickhouse is most famous for annoucing the Cubs, but he also called games for the Bears, Bulls and White Sox, announced pro wrestling, and several national broadcasts, including the famous Willie Mays "Basket Catch" in the 1954 world series at the Polo Grounds.
Monday, May 26, 2008
State of the Sox (5/19-5/25)
MAY 19TH - MAY 25TH
Tuesday, May 20th vs Cleveland W 4-1
Sabathia (L, 3-6), Contreras (W, 5-3), Jenks (S, 11)
Wednesday, May 21th vs Cleveland W 7-2
Byrd (L, 2-4), Vazquez (W, 5-3)
Thursday, May 22th vs Cleveland W 3-1
Laffey (L, 2-3), Linebrink (W, 1-0), Jenks (S, 12)
Friday, May 23th vs LA Angels L 3-1
Saunders (W, 8-1), Floyd (L, 4-3), F. Rodriguez (S, 20)
Saturday, May 24th vs LA Angels L 2-0
Weaver (W, 4-5), Danks (L, 3-4), F. Rodriguez (S, 21)
Sunday, May 25th vs LA Angels W 3-2
Lackey (L, 1-1), Linebrink (W, 2-0)
Sabathia (L, 3-6), Contreras (W, 5-3), Jenks (S, 11)
Wednesday, May 21th vs Cleveland W 7-2
Byrd (L, 2-4), Vazquez (W, 5-3)
Thursday, May 22th vs Cleveland W 3-1
Laffey (L, 2-3), Linebrink (W, 1-0), Jenks (S, 12)
Friday, May 23th vs LA Angels L 3-1
Saunders (W, 8-1), Floyd (L, 4-3), F. Rodriguez (S, 20)
Saturday, May 24th vs LA Angels L 2-0
Weaver (W, 4-5), Danks (L, 3-4), F. Rodriguez (S, 21)
Sunday, May 25th vs LA Angels W 3-2
Lackey (L, 1-1), Linebrink (W, 2-0)
Heros - Carlos Quentin .300 avg, 3 HR, 6 RBI; Jermaine Dye .300 avg, 2 HR, 6 RBI; Jose Contreras 14 IP, 1.93 ERA; Scott Linebrink 4 games, 0 ERA
Bums - AJ Pierzynski .050 avg, 0 RBI; Jim Thome .190, 7 SO
Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Carlos Quentin. Paul Konerko has a 'hand injury' that has been bothering him, he sat the last 3 game, and only had 10 at bats in the whole week. I kinda wish Jim Thome would get a 'hand injury.' This Sox team is actually pretty decent. The pitching this week was phenomenal, and the hitting can't continue to be this bad....right? Unless of course Carlos Quentin can continue to carry this offense on his back, but he can't really do that....can he? Gavin Floyd threw a complete game, but in the 5th he gave up a homer, walk, hit, walk and 2 hbp to score the 3 runs in that inning, which were the only runs he gave up in a 3-1 loss.
So lets say...The offense gets better, and the pitching slows down a bit, this team is still better than average and has a chance to win this (weak) AL Central. OR! We could clone Carlos Quentin and have him play every position. Then we can move Chris Zorich to linebacker. Yea! So in conclusion, Devin Hester, you are ridiculous!
State of the Cubs (5/19 - 5/25)
MAY 19TH - MAY 25TH
Monday, May 19th vs Houston W 7-2
Lilly (W, 5-4), Moehler (L, 1-1)
Tuesday, May 20th vs Houston L 4-2
Dempster (L, 5-2), Sampson (W, 3-3), (S, Valverde 13)
Wednesday, May 21st vs Houston L 5-3
Gallagher (L, 1-1), Chacon (W, 1-0) (S, Valverde 14)
Friday, May 23rd vs Pittsburgh W 12-3
Zambrano (W, 7-1), Duke (L, 2-3)
Saturday, May 24th vs Pittsburgh L 5-4 (14 Inn)
Wuertz (L, 0-1), Grabow (W, 4-1)
Sunday, May 25th vs Pittsburgh L 6-5 (11 Inn)
Leiber (L, 2-3), Marte (W, 4-0)
Monday, May 19th vs Houston W 7-2
Lilly (W, 5-4), Moehler (L, 1-1)
Tuesday, May 20th vs Houston L 4-2
Dempster (L, 5-2), Sampson (W, 3-3), (S, Valverde 13)
Wednesday, May 21st vs Houston L 5-3
Gallagher (L, 1-1), Chacon (W, 1-0) (S, Valverde 14)
Friday, May 23rd vs Pittsburgh W 12-3
Zambrano (W, 7-1), Duke (L, 2-3)
Saturday, May 24th vs Pittsburgh L 5-4 (14 Inn)
Wuertz (L, 0-1), Grabow (W, 4-1)
Sunday, May 25th vs Pittsburgh L 6-5 (11 Inn)
Leiber (L, 2-3), Marte (W, 4-0)
The Cubs went 2-4 on the road this week with two series that mirrored each other. Both began with promising blowout victories and ended with eminently frustrating back to back losses.
Despite the fact that Sunday's loss, coupled with the Cardinals victory over the Dodgers knocked the Cubs back to second in the division, Cubs fans shouldn't worry.
Looking at the Houston series, the Cubs lost games 2 and 3 because their offense failed to have more than one productive inning in each game. It's a fact that the Cubs are struggling to hit on the road, and bludgeoning teams at Wrigley, but for the most part, it seems to be a fluke. My buddies over at Another Cubs Blog took a look at the home and road BABIP splits. The Cubs hit a lot of line drives, and teams that do score lots of runs, it just so happens that less balls are falling in, and as the season goes on and the sample size gets bigger, the team will score more runs away from Wrigley.
Offense really wasn't a problem in the Pittsburgh series. What happened in that series happens to all teams throughout a season, you have a team beat twice, in one game your closer hits a guy then can't get out of the 9th, in the other your left fielder drops a ball in the sun. Both things happen, both things suck, both are things you should be frustrated about, but big picture they're not that big a deal, the Cubs should have two more wins right now, but this team is still going to win 87-93 games and probably win the division by 6 games.
...I'd just feel a lot better with a different closer.
Despite the fact that Sunday's loss, coupled with the Cardinals victory over the Dodgers knocked the Cubs back to second in the division, Cubs fans shouldn't worry.
Looking at the Houston series, the Cubs lost games 2 and 3 because their offense failed to have more than one productive inning in each game. It's a fact that the Cubs are struggling to hit on the road, and bludgeoning teams at Wrigley, but for the most part, it seems to be a fluke. My buddies over at Another Cubs Blog took a look at the home and road BABIP splits. The Cubs hit a lot of line drives, and teams that do score lots of runs, it just so happens that less balls are falling in, and as the season goes on and the sample size gets bigger, the team will score more runs away from Wrigley.
Offense really wasn't a problem in the Pittsburgh series. What happened in that series happens to all teams throughout a season, you have a team beat twice, in one game your closer hits a guy then can't get out of the 9th, in the other your left fielder drops a ball in the sun. Both things happen, both things suck, both are things you should be frustrated about, but big picture they're not that big a deal, the Cubs should have two more wins right now, but this team is still going to win 87-93 games and probably win the division by 6 games.
...I'd just feel a lot better with a different closer.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Friday Game Review - Final Fantasy VI
So begins the finest Japanese style RPG of all time.
FFVI was released in North America in October of 1994. Though it was the sixth game in the series, it was only the third game released in the United States and thus w
as titled Final Fantasy III. It's still what I think of when I think about RPGs. Graphically it was one of the most beautiful games of it's time, it has one of the best soundtracks to ever grace a 16 bit game, and it had one of the most fleshed out and enjoyable combat systems of its day.None of these things make really make Final Fantasy VI stand out today, however. What keeps FFVI relevant are the story and characters. It was horribly translated in its first iteration. Some concepts that require entire phrases to express in English can be represented by single characters in Japanese, and because of this, there were entire lines of dialog that had to be omitted from the American version because of technical limitations.
None of it matters. The game just has... moments. The Opera, The Falcon, dozens of others. And the characters, oh my the characters. It wasn't pure good vs pure evil... at least not from the start. You had characters in it for money, honor, women, people running from their past, and people trying to find their future. Green haired women with amnesia actually weren't cleche in 1994 either. FFVI had a way
of making you genuinely care about the little sprites you moved around on screen. Some of them die. Others don't turn out the way you'd like them to, and that's part of what makes the game so great. Good wins in the end, but it's far from cut and dry.Final Fantasy VI looks like a cartoon, like all JRPGs it plays like an interactive version of Microsoft Excel, but thematically it reached so far beyond anything else of its day. It's not Dickens, but in the Relm of video games the story may as well be classical literature. FFVI might seem a bit trite today, but that's only because so much of what came after it borrowed from it so heavily. If you can deal with JRPGs at all, you owe it to yourself to play it, if you can't, well... there's always this.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Holy Roses Batman!
ShockSilence
Excitement
Fear
Thrill
Joy
Fervor
And excitement
Those were the immediate reactions I had when I found out the Bulls, somehow, got the #1 overall pick in the NBA draft next season. Bellwether sent me a text and told me that Paxson must have made a deal with the devil. I agree. 1.7% chance. The 9 spot. The highest a 9 has moved up in the draft was to 6. Not anymore. On June 26th the Chicago Bulls will be the first team to take the podium.
Now onto who the Bulls should select. Derrick Rose. Derrick Rose. The Great Poohdini. The Mean Street Express. Derrick Rose. There's no question here.
"Every young kid who plays basketball dreams of playing in the NBA. The thought of being drafted by your hometown makes it extra special, especially when your team has a tradition like the Bulls and the great players that have come out of the organization. If it does happen, I promise to come ready and prepared to play, give it everything I have and do whatever I’m asked to do for the team."
He's going to be a great point guard for a long time in the NBA. It would be really nice if he was wearing Bulls across his chest while he's doing it. Added bonus besides the fact that he's he best player in this years draft? He's a home town kid. Grew up in Englewood idolizing Michael Jordan. Even wore #23 at Memphis, too bad he'll have to stop that tradition when he gets to Chicago. I cannot wait. Have I mentioned that I'm excited?
That right there looks so pretty.Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Jim Durham > most everything
The clip from my previous blog does zero justice to Jim Durham. Jim Durham is a staple when talking about 'the MJ days.' There is no play by play announcer that equals his energy and pure excitement for the game. I wish I could have found a 'the shot' clip with Durham and Johnny 'Red' Kerr.
And now, with no further adieu, Jim Durham.
^^For more on Jim Durham, buy this^^
And now, with no further adieu, Jim Durham.
^^For more on Jim Durham, buy this^^Monday, May 19, 2008
Dear LeBron,
You're not Dominique Wilkins. Paul Pierce is not Larry Bird. I understand that making that comparison during your post game press conference shows that you're a 'student of the game' and you respect its history.Here's a history lesson.
You are not Michael Jordan. During a game 7, you tried a lay-up that would have brought your team to within one of the Celtics. After your horrid attempt at a flop, you then decided to look around for the refs, pleading your case for the foul. You sir, are not Michael Jordan, you're not even in his league; You're lucky they let you wear 23. I understand your off the court personality is to be commended, however maybe you should start playing stellar basketball and go 100% from whistle to whistle if you want to be mentioned in the same conversation as His Airness. Michael did his talking on the court, I advise you do the same.
Oh yea, and you should probably learn how to do this too...
State of the cubs (5/12 - 5/18)
MAY 12TH - MAY 18TH
Monday, May 12th vs San Diego W 12-3
Wolf (L, 2-3), Zambrano (W, 6-1)
Tuesday, May 13th vs San Diego L 4-3
Estes (W, 1-0), Marquis (L, 1-3), (S, Hoffman 7)
Wednesday, May 14th vs San Diego W 8-5
Peavy (L, 4-3), Lilly (W, 4-4)
Thursday, May 15th vs San Diego W 4-0
Maddux (L, 3-4), Dempster (W, 5-1) Wood (S, 8)
Friday, May 16th vs Pittsburgh W 7-4
Gorzelanny (L, 3-4), Gallagher (W, 1-0), Wood (S, 9)
Saturday, May 17th vs Pittsburgh L 7-6
Marte (W, 3-0), Marmol (L, 1-1) Capps (S, 10)
Sunday, May 18th vs Pittsburgh W 4-3
Dumatrait (L, 1-2), Marquis (W, 2-3), Wood (S, 10)
Monday, May 12th vs San Diego W 12-3
Wolf (L, 2-3), Zambrano (W, 6-1)
Tuesday, May 13th vs San Diego L 4-3
Estes (W, 1-0), Marquis (L, 1-3), (S, Hoffman 7)
Wednesday, May 14th vs San Diego W 8-5
Peavy (L, 4-3), Lilly (W, 4-4)
Thursday, May 15th vs San Diego W 4-0
Maddux (L, 3-4), Dempster (W, 5-1) Wood (S, 8)
Friday, May 16th vs Pittsburgh W 7-4
Gorzelanny (L, 3-4), Gallagher (W, 1-0), Wood (S, 9)
Saturday, May 17th vs Pittsburgh L 7-6
Marte (W, 3-0), Marmol (L, 1-1) Capps (S, 10)
Sunday, May 18th vs Pittsburgh W 4-3
Dumatrait (L, 1-2), Marquis (W, 2-3), Wood (S, 10)
Yes, the Cubs went 5-2 this week to complete an 8-2 homestand. And yes, the team is now 27-17 possessing the second best record in all of major league baseball, and YES, they're two games up on the rest of the NL Central and their seven games up on the Brewers who were supposed to be the only real competition in the division.
While all of that is certainly a big deal, the story of the week, is this guy:
That's right, no word wrap, he's that good.
In case you haven't been paying attention in the past week, Alfonso Soriano has posted the following:
16/31, 10 runs scored, 7 homers, 14 RBI.
The rest of the Cubs have been hitting league average this week and yet the team's run differential was a +16.
Monday morning's PECOTA projections give the Cubs a better than 68% chance of winning the division, and better than 9% chance of winning the wild card if they don't. Overall they have better than a 77% chance of making the playoffs, best of any team in the major leagues.
The Cubs have three games coming up against the Astros starting tonight, and three more against the Pirates this weekend. The middle of the Astros' lineup has been killing the ball lately and the 'Stros are 2.5 back of the Cubs in third place in the division.
Zambrano's meltdown on Saturday was unfortunate. He's scheduled to go on Friday against the Pirates at PNC. Getting him back into his proper mental state is going to be the most important task for the Cubs this week. Granted, you'd like to win 4 or 5 games and bury everyone in the division besides the Cardinals, but the truth is all of those teams, including St. Louis, will bury themselves. I don't think there's anything to worry about with Z, but I want to see him go out and throw a solid game this week.
While all of that is certainly a big deal, the story of the week, is this guy:
That's right, no word wrap, he's that good.
In case you haven't been paying attention in the past week, Alfonso Soriano has posted the following:
16/31, 10 runs scored, 7 homers, 14 RBI.
The rest of the Cubs have been hitting league average this week and yet the team's run differential was a +16.
Monday morning's PECOTA projections give the Cubs a better than 68% chance of winning the division, and better than 9% chance of winning the wild card if they don't. Overall they have better than a 77% chance of making the playoffs, best of any team in the major leagues.
The Cubs have three games coming up against the Astros starting tonight, and three more against the Pirates this weekend. The middle of the Astros' lineup has been killing the ball lately and the 'Stros are 2.5 back of the Cubs in third place in the division.
Zambrano's meltdown on Saturday was unfortunate. He's scheduled to go on Friday against the Pirates at PNC. Getting him back into his proper mental state is going to be the most important task for the Cubs this week. Granted, you'd like to win 4 or 5 games and bury everyone in the division besides the Cardinals, but the truth is all of those teams, including St. Louis, will bury themselves. I don't think there's anything to worry about with Z, but I want to see him go out and throw a solid game this week.
State of the Sox (5/12-5/18)
MAY 12TH - MAY 18TH
Monday, May 12th @ LA Angels L 7-10
Buehrle (L, 1-5), Adenhart (W, 1-0), Rodriguez, F (S, 15)
Tuesday, May 13th @ LA Angels L 0-2
Dotel(L, 1-2), Shields (W, 2-0), Rodriguez, F (S, 16)
Wednesday, May 14th @ LA Angels W 6-1
Contreras (W, 4-3), Shields (L, 2-1)
Thursday, May 15th @ LA Angels W 4-3
Dotel (W, 2-2), Rodriguez, F (L, 0-1), Jenks (S, 8)
Friday, May 16th @ San Fransisco W 2-0
Floyd (W, 4-2), Sanchez (L 2-3), Jenks (S, 9)
Saturday, May 17th @ San Fransisco W 3-1
Buehrle (W, 2-5), Zito (L, 0-8), Jenks (S, 10)
Sunday, May 11th @ San Fransisco W 13-8
Thorton (W, 1-0), Walker (L, 1-2), Masset (S, 1)
Buehrle (L, 1-5), Adenhart (W, 1-0), Rodriguez, F (S, 15)
Tuesday, May 13th @ LA Angels L 0-2
Dotel(L, 1-2), Shields (W, 2-0), Rodriguez, F (S, 16)
Wednesday, May 14th @ LA Angels W 6-1
Contreras (W, 4-3), Shields (L, 2-1)
Thursday, May 15th @ LA Angels W 4-3
Dotel (W, 2-2), Rodriguez, F (L, 0-1), Jenks (S, 8)
Friday, May 16th @ San Fransisco W 2-0
Floyd (W, 4-2), Sanchez (L 2-3), Jenks (S, 9)
Saturday, May 17th @ San Fransisco W 3-1
Buehrle (W, 2-5), Zito (L, 0-8), Jenks (S, 10)
Sunday, May 11th @ San Fransisco W 13-8
Thorton (W, 1-0), Walker (L, 1-2), Masset (S, 1)
Heros - Carlos Quentin .320 avg, 7RBI, grand slam; AJ Pierzynski .391 avg; Bobby Jenks 0 ER, 3 saves; Ozzie Guillen
Bums - Paul Konerko .148 avg, 6 SO; Jim Thome .105 avg, 7 SO
Ozzie makes the Heros section for the new lineup:
Orlando Cabrera
AJ Pierzynski
Carlos Quentin
Jermaine Dye
Jim Thome
Paul Konerko
Joe Crede
Nick Swisher
Juan Uribe
First in the AL Central. 5-2 this week, 5 game winning streak. 7-3 on the 10 game west coast road trip, which is absolutely amazing. Normally the White Sox could play a 8-10 year old little league team west of the Rocky Mountains, and they'd lose. So maybe this team isn't as horrible as once predicted...
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Elia Remix
Update: this blog post has been syndicated on anothercubsblog.net. If you're a Cubs fan or a stat guy like I am, you should go check them out.
Read along and listen:
I'll tell ya one fuckin' thing
I'm glad he's fucking hotter than shit, just to stuff it up them forty-one thousand yuppie assclowns that showed up and boo him every fuckin' day in April.
Because if they're the real Chicago fuckin' fans they can kiss my fuckin ass, RIGHT DOWNTOWN and PRINT IT.
They really, really like their superstars around here... MY FUCKIN ASS!
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Watch them kiss Reed Johnson's ass, and be quiet about it? For the stupid fucking Murph callers who think Soriano's overrated? The motherfuckin trust fund babies from Schaumburg haven't worked an honest day in their life and they call him overpaid?
They outta go root for a different team and find out what it's like to have something to boo about.
Eighty five percent of the baseball fans can see what Soriano can do, the other fifteen root for this team!
It's a fucking playground for yuppie douchebags!
Rip them motherfuckers, RIP them fucking cocksuckers like they rip the fuckin players.
This guy put up an eleven-hundred OPS in September last year and them fuckin people boo?
And that's the Cubs fans? My. Fucking. Ass.
You talk about the great fucking support guys like Theriot and Johnson get. That's all I've seen this fuckin' year.
The name of the game is hit the ball, catch the ball, and get the fuckin job done. What more do you want from this guy? Right now, we have less losses than we have wins.
The fucking changes in this fanbase since 2003 are noticeable!
Alright they don't boo the useless LSU guys cause we're 26-16, and unfortunately that's the criteria of the dumb 41,000 that come out to day baseball. The rest of the baseball world didn't want those guys.
It'll take more than a 26-15 or 26-16 to make me forget how much those two guys and Johnson suck.
I'll guarantee ya that, you got some great fuckin' players on this team, but you're stuck with the fucking love fest of Theriot, and Johnson and Fontenot.
All these motherfuckin' editorials about smart ball and hustle and fucking uh... scrappyness and all that shit. It's sickening.
It's unbelievable, it really is. It's a disheartening fuckin situation we're in right now. 26-16 doesn't mean those three don't suck. You got a hundred and twenty fuckin' games left.
What I'm tryin' to say is, don't rip Soriano. You wanna rip somebody? Rip them, you wanna rip somebody rip those three, but don't fuckin rip Soriano cause he's given everything he can give.
Once this team hits the middle of the season those LSU guys will blow, and they will blow, the talent's not there. I don't know how to make it any clearer to you. I'm frustrated, I guarentee you I'm frustrated. It'd be different if I went to a ball park where fans understood the fuckin game, but Wrigley's a dumb fuckin bar... in a dumb fuckin sports city period.
Since may 1st:
26 for 65, .400 avg, 15 runs, 6 2B, 7 HR, 20 RBI.
Read along and listen:
I'll tell ya one fuckin' thing
I'm glad he's fucking hotter than shit, just to stuff it up them forty-one thousand yuppie assclowns that showed up and boo him every fuckin' day in April.
Because if they're the real Chicago fuckin' fans they can kiss my fuckin ass, RIGHT DOWNTOWN and PRINT IT.
They really, really like their superstars around here... MY FUCKIN ASS!
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Watch them kiss Reed Johnson's ass, and be quiet about it? For the stupid fucking Murph callers who think Soriano's overrated? The motherfuckin trust fund babies from Schaumburg haven't worked an honest day in their life and they call him overpaid?
They outta go root for a different team and find out what it's like to have something to boo about.
Eighty five percent of the baseball fans can see what Soriano can do, the other fifteen root for this team!
It's a fucking playground for yuppie douchebags!
Rip them motherfuckers, RIP them fucking cocksuckers like they rip the fuckin players.
This guy put up an eleven-hundred OPS in September last year and them fuckin people boo?
And that's the Cubs fans? My. Fucking. Ass.
You talk about the great fucking support guys like Theriot and Johnson get. That's all I've seen this fuckin' year.
The name of the game is hit the ball, catch the ball, and get the fuckin job done. What more do you want from this guy? Right now, we have less losses than we have wins.
The fucking changes in this fanbase since 2003 are noticeable!
Alright they don't boo the useless LSU guys cause we're 26-16, and unfortunately that's the criteria of the dumb 41,000 that come out to day baseball. The rest of the baseball world didn't want those guys.
It'll take more than a 26-15 or 26-16 to make me forget how much those two guys and Johnson suck.
I'll guarantee ya that, you got some great fuckin' players on this team, but you're stuck with the fucking love fest of Theriot, and Johnson and Fontenot.
All these motherfuckin' editorials about smart ball and hustle and fucking uh... scrappyness and all that shit. It's sickening.
It's unbelievable, it really is. It's a disheartening fuckin situation we're in right now. 26-16 doesn't mean those three don't suck. You got a hundred and twenty fuckin' games left.
What I'm tryin' to say is, don't rip Soriano. You wanna rip somebody? Rip them, you wanna rip somebody rip those three, but don't fuckin rip Soriano cause he's given everything he can give.
Once this team hits the middle of the season those LSU guys will blow, and they will blow, the talent's not there. I don't know how to make it any clearer to you. I'm frustrated, I guarentee you I'm frustrated. It'd be different if I went to a ball park where fans understood the fuckin game, but Wrigley's a dumb fuckin bar... in a dumb fuckin sports city period.
Since may 1st:
26 for 65, .400 avg, 15 runs, 6 2B, 7 HR, 20 RBI.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Songs That Weren't On Sufjan Stevens "Illinois" But Should Have Been
Bankruptcy ((INFO)) ((TAPES))
Wrought Iron Fences
What’s That Smell? Oh, It’s Just Gary
The Great Fireworks Smuggling Ring Of Late June 1992
Why Does West Chicago Glow?
Tic-Tac-Toe, We Play It On Our Runways
Du-Page County And Our Republican Overlords
55-MPH, What The Fuck?
588-2300
Blagvoj- Blajovo- Blagojv- Blago- …Rod
Comiskey Park And The Body Buried At Our Ball Yard, And There’s Another Over There
The White Siblings Of Black Music And The Great Movie It Made Back In The 80s
The Quad Cities Blow, But Not As Much As Cairo
The Stuttering Nepotistic Mayor And His Mob Cronies Pick Up Our Garbage, Sell Our Highways, Steal Our Money, And That’s How We Like It
East St. Louis, West Beirut
Ditka
Wrought Iron Fences
What’s That Smell? Oh, It’s Just Gary
The Great Fireworks Smuggling Ring Of Late June 1992
Why Does West Chicago Glow?
Tic-Tac-Toe, We Play It On Our Runways
Du-Page County And Our Republican Overlords
55-MPH, What The Fuck?
588-2300
Blagvoj- Blajovo- Blagojv- Blago- …Rod
Comiskey Park And The Body Buried At Our Ball Yard, And There’s Another Over There
The White Siblings Of Black Music And The Great Movie It Made Back In The 80s
The Quad Cities Blow, But Not As Much As Cairo
The Stuttering Nepotistic Mayor And His Mob Cronies Pick Up Our Garbage, Sell Our Highways, Steal Our Money, And That’s How We Like It
East St. Louis, West Beirut
Ditka
Monday, May 12, 2008
State of the Sox (5/5 - 5/11)
MAY 5TH - MAY 11TH
Monday, May 5th @ Toronto L 0-1
Vasquez (L, 3-3), McGowan (W, 2-2), Ryan (S, 5)
Tuesday, May 6th vs Minnesota W 7-1
Blackburn (L, 2-2), Floyd (W, 3-1)
Wednesday, May 7th vs Minnesota L 1-13
Hernandez (W, 5-1), Buehrle (L, 1-4)
Thursday, May 8th vs Minnesota W 6-2
Slowey (L, 0-2), Danks (W, 3-3)
Friday, May 9th @ Seattle W 4-2
Contreras (W, 3-3), Silva (L, 3-2), Jenks (S, 7)
Saturday, May 10th @ Seattle W 8-4
Vasquez (W, 4-3), Washburn (L, 2-5)
Sunday, May 11th @ Seattle L 6-3
Floyd (L, 3-2), Batista (L, 3-4), Putz (S, 3)
Vasquez (L, 3-3), McGowan (W, 2-2), Ryan (S, 5)
Tuesday, May 6th vs Minnesota W 7-1
Blackburn (L, 2-2), Floyd (W, 3-1)
Wednesday, May 7th vs Minnesota L 1-13
Hernandez (W, 5-1), Buehrle (L, 1-4)
Thursday, May 8th vs Minnesota W 6-2
Slowey (L, 0-2), Danks (W, 3-3)
Friday, May 9th @ Seattle W 4-2
Contreras (W, 3-3), Silva (L, 3-2), Jenks (S, 7)
Saturday, May 10th @ Seattle W 8-4
Vasquez (W, 4-3), Washburn (L, 2-5)
Sunday, May 11th @ Seattle L 6-3
Floyd (L, 3-2), Batista (L, 3-4), Putz (S, 3)
4-3 This week.
Heros - Jermaine Dye .350, 3 HR, 5 RBI; Carlos Quentin .345, HR, 7 RBI; Gavin Floyd vs Minn May 6th - 8.1 inn, 1 hit, 1 run; Javier Vazquez 13.1 inn, 3.38 ERA, 15 SO
Bums - Paul Konerko .200, 7 SO; Jim Thome .250, 5 SO; Mark Buehrle 5.2 inn, 7 ER; Ehren Wasserman, 1.1 inn, 6 ER
The White Sox cannot win without slugging. They cannot manufacture any runs what-so-ever. This how this team was built, so I'm not overly surprised. Jim Thome can't hit left handed pitching right now (maybe he just can't hit it at all anymore), Paul Konerko and Nick Swisher are going through awful slumps. They moved Orlando Cabrera to the lead off spot, and the day he goes 4-5, he scores once and they lose.I don't think Ozzie knows what to do with this team, probably because there isn't much to do. When a power hitting team isn't hitting, you lose. They're lucky to have won as many games as they have. Unless this team starts hitting soon, they're gonna lose a lot of games, because this pitching isn't going to stay this good for long.
My Suggestion? More sex toys.
State of the Cubs (5/5 - 5/11)
MAY 5TH - MAY 11TH
Monday, May 5th @ Cincinnati L 3-5
Dempster (L, 4-1), Cueto (W, 2-3), Cordero (S, 5)
Tuesday, May 6th @ Cincinnati W 3-0
Zambrano (W, 5-1), Harang (L, 1-5) Wood (S, 5)
Wednesday, May 7th @ Cincinnati L 9-0
Leiber (L, 2-2), Volquez (W, 4-1)
Friday, May 9th vs Arizona W 3-1
Haren (L, 4-2), Lilly (W, 3-4), Wood (S, 6)
Saturday, May 10th vs Arizona W 7-2
Qualls (L, 0-4), Eyre (W, 1-0)
Sunday, May 11th vs Arizona W 6-4
Pena (L, 0-1), Marmol (W, 1-0), Wood (S, 7)
Monday, May 5th @ Cincinnati L 3-5
Dempster (L, 4-1), Cueto (W, 2-3), Cordero (S, 5)
Tuesday, May 6th @ Cincinnati W 3-0
Zambrano (W, 5-1), Harang (L, 1-5) Wood (S, 5)
Wednesday, May 7th @ Cincinnati L 9-0
Leiber (L, 2-2), Volquez (W, 4-1)
Friday, May 9th vs Arizona W 3-1
Haren (L, 4-2), Lilly (W, 3-4), Wood (S, 6)
Saturday, May 10th vs Arizona W 7-2
Qualls (L, 0-4), Eyre (W, 1-0)
Sunday, May 11th vs Arizona W 6-4
Pena (L, 0-1), Marmol (W, 1-0), Wood (S, 7)
I made a comment to TAS on Thursday to the effect of "If there's any team in baseball that needs an off day and a home stand, it's the Cubs. Unfortunately they've got the Diamondbacks coming in."
Coming into the weekend, the Cubs had dropped 9 of 13, lost 4 straight series, three straight against division rivals. Do understand, that I have zero doubt that the Cubs, barring major injury, will win the division. This was as true last Thursday as it is today. Monday morning's PECOTA projections show the Cubs have a better than 73% chance of making the post season, highest in the majors.
You feel better about your odds when your team is actually winning baseball games, and with the D-backs coming in, and the Cubs slumping, the chances of turning things around this past weekend looked bleak. I thought the Cubs might be able to pull a series win out of their hats, but by about 1:30 on Friday afternoon, I was certain we were in for a loooong series.
Fortunately, that was all Ted Lilly would allow, striking out ten as the Cubs got their offense from Lee, Soriano and Lilly giving the team a 3-1 come from behind win. Lilly's 7.0 IP, 10K performance is arguably his best as a Cub.
Saturday, Dempster was one questionable call on a ball away from throwing 6 shutout innings, but sometimes the calls don't go your way. It didn't matter, the Cubs came from behind again, dropping 6 on Chad Qualis and Brandon Medders in the 7th. Qualis had a sub 1 ERA coming into the game. For two straight days, the Cubs played honest to goodness championship baseball against the best team in the national league.
Sunday, the Cubs scratched Zambrano to ensure his start didn't get washed out. Sean Gallagher got the start and though his final line wasn't very impressive, he threw four sparkling innings before tiring in the fifth. Gallagher was a starter at AAA Iowa, but has been in the pen for 14 days before being stretched out Sunday. He hit 91-94 on the gun, showed decent command and had great stuff at times. Both pitchers were squeezed both high and on the outside (the strike zone was the size of the proverbial teacup yesterday, Feisty) which may have cost Gallagher a run.
Bad Chad Fox came on to put out the fire and promptly walked two batters with the bases loaded. The Cubs were able to draw even in the 7th on Reed Johnson's homer (Johnson, by the way, remains awful at baseball.) Darryl Ward came to the plate in the eighth with the bases loaded and one down.
Wood nailed down the save. Cubs sweep the Diamondbacks.
So everything is fine. Just as it was on Thursday, it just feels a lot better now. Four games this week against the brutal, brutal Padres, and three more against the Pirates who have won 5 in a row, but are 0-6 against the Cubs this year.
The way I see it, the Cubs are a legitimately good team in an awful division. They should win the Central by at least 6 games, but they're 3 or 4 pieces away from being world series contenders.
The Cubs need a legitimate #2 starter. This is going to be the hardest piece to find. Who knows, maybe you catch lightening in a bottle with Gallagher, in all likelihood you're going to have to go and trade for a piece from a team that decides to be a seller at the deadline.
They also need another reliable arm in the bullpen. I kinda think this one will work itself out... Relievers are very fleeting. By definition, they're the worst players on your team. Pitchers who aren't good enough to be closers or starters. The Cubs have guys in Howrey, Wurtz and Eyre who have shown they're more than capable of being good relievers in the past it's highly unlikely they'll be as bad as they've been to start the season. If you can get one of those three guys good to pair with Marmol and Wood (who I'm warming on) you should be fine.
The Cubs need an outfielder who can play Center, either as a starter or a 4th outfielder, because -and I'm going to keep beating the drum on this one- Reed Johnson is not the answer. If it were up to me, I'd play Felix Pie every day. Soriano is starting to hit, Lee, Fukudome and Ramirez are all playing well. Soto is hitting like Mike Piazza right now. The team can afford to let Pie start for a few weeks and see if he can't figure major league pitching out. The guy bats like .450 at AAA, he's not going to get better down there, he's also not going to get better playing once every five days. He needs to start regularly.
If you can find a guy to start in center, great, if you can find a starting corner outfielder, you can move Fukudome to center. Regardless, you need to add another outfielder. It looks like Hendry wants to take a shot on Jim Edmonds. Which... whatever. If he's got anything left in the tank it's worth taking a flier on him, I just don't think he's got anything left in the tank.
Finally, the Cubs need a middle infielder. Second or short, doesn't matter, just somebody that gets Fontenot off the team and Theriot to the bench. Ideally you'd play this addition at their natural position and Cedeno at the other postion, you'd have DeRosa be the super sub and Theriot the backup. That's probably not going to happen, though, so hopefully you can strengthen the team at 2nd, and make your team better by playing Cedeno at short more often (thus keeping Hustle McFaggerton on the bench.)
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Reed Johnson's OPS is .645
On base percentageplus
Slugging percentage
Six Fourty-Five
For the month of may it's .374
HIS SLUGGING PERCENTAGE FOR THE SEASON IS .295
HIS SLUGGING PERCENTAGE IS WORSE THAN TED LILLY'S
His VORP is -1.9. Ted Lilly's offensive VORP is 1.2. For the season, he has literally produced worse offensive numbers THAN ONE OF THE WORST HITTING PITCHERS I'VE EVER SEEN!
His WARP1 is -0.1 which means that playing Reed Johnson for a season will actually cost you one tenth of a victory over AAA level call up replacement player X. His EQA is .237.
Folks, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but this guy blows. I know he's grindy and white and grindy and he has a soul patch and he's not Soriano and everyone hates Soriano, and he grinds but give it a rest.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
I did it
I found the dumbest kid in America, maybe the world. This little shit has been wearing a Brett Favre jersy since December of 2003. He just turned 12. If I wore a Michael Jordan jersey from age 7 to age 12, my mom would have beat my ass, but at least I would have been cooler than this kid (Jordan > Favre). A Brett Favre jersey? Really? Come on. I'm pretty sure I genuinely hate this kid. A lot. How did his parents let him do this? What's wrong with these people? Seriously, if I had worn a sports jersey on picture day in 3rd grade, the shit would have hit the fan in my house. I would also like to point out that this kid lives in Connecticut, which is over a thousand miles away from Green Bay. What a stupid little kid. And look at him, he looks like someone who would wear a crappy jersey for 1,581 days. I shouldn't even be talking about this, what a little shit. I bet he smells bad too.
The 104 Game Baseball Season
In an effort to make baseball an event, something special, a league on par with the NFL in buzzworthyness and gambling possibilities. I’ve completely destroyed most baseball traditions to present to you:
Combine the
Move the
Move the Brewers back to the
Create two divisions in each league of 7 teams each
The 104 game season consists of 26 weeks of baseball. Just like in the NFL, weeks are solidly defined. They begin on Friday and end on Sunday, Monday, or Tuesday.
Individual Ws and Ls don't matter anymore, instead, what matters are points, just as in Hockey. Points will be awarded for winning a series.
Both division winners, and two wild card teams make the playoffs from each league. Wild Card teams will be the two teams with the highest points after the two division winners.
"Standard" series consist of 4 game intra-league series, played on Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun with 1 NL and one
Scoring for Standard series:
Lose the series = 0 points
Win the series = 2 points
Sweep the series = 4 points
"Interleague" will be three game series played on Fri-Sat-Sun with two prime time series, one AL and one NL, one being played Fri-Sun-Mon, the other Fri-Sat-Mon.
Win = 2
Sweep = 3
Week 1-12 Standard
Week 13-16 Interleague
Week 17-22 Standard
Week 23-26 Division
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Nike makes me want to be a better person
Or at least not as fat.
And they almost make me want to play/like soccer
But don't worry, I don't like soccer
And I like being fat.
Watch out leftover pork roast, here I come.
And they almost make me want to play/like soccer
But don't worry, I don't like soccer
And I like being fat.
Watch out leftover pork roast, here I come.
EVERYONE LIKES FANCY COFFEE... FUCK!
So I'm sitting here, flipping between Cubs, MSNBC, and CNN.
Why is it any time people want to refer to Liberal voters they use the term "Latte sipping" or "Starbucks drinking." It's such a stupid, tired, cleche. Rich people, poor people, liberals, conservatives, white, black, if you like coffee, you probably like the occasional fancy coffee drink, and if you don't, it's not because of the political party you identify with.
Why is it any time people want to refer to Liberal voters they use the term "Latte sipping" or "Starbucks drinking." It's such a stupid, tired, cleche. Rich people, poor people, liberals, conservatives, white, black, if you like coffee, you probably like the occasional fancy coffee drink, and if you don't, it's not because of the political party you identify with.
HERE COMES THE HOOK
I cannot believe it's been ten years. As if 1998 didn't feel long enough ago already:
05-06-98
What could have been.
Edit: I miss when Sportscenter would put the home broadcast audio faintly behind their highlights. I suppose it doesn't matter as it's been about ten years since I watched Sportscenter.
05-06-98
What could have been.
Edit: I miss when Sportscenter would put the home broadcast audio faintly behind their highlights. I suppose it doesn't matter as it's been about ten years since I watched Sportscenter.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Iron Man Redux
Took in Iron Man last night. For the ADD afflicted of you out there: go see it. It gives you exactly what you want.
For everyone else: Iron Man succeeds where so many other superhero movies fail. I expect the action sequences of any superhero movie to kick ass, and they do in Iron Man, what I worry about is that 1/3rd of the movie where they build the character and show how the superhero gains his powers, and that's one of the two things that makes Iron Man so strong.
There's really no Iron Man "persona" which is awesome. Iron Man is Tony Stark is Iron Man. He puts on his suit, and kicks ass, but he's still Tony. The transformation of the character IS the transformation of Tony Stark. Therein lies the second part of Iron Man that I loved so much.
At the beginning of the movie, Tony Stark isn't a hero, he's not even an anti-hero. He's a brilliant, rich guy who likes pussy, booze and the spotlight, all while holding onto his self-appointed moral ambiguity for dear life. By the end of the movie, Tony's got the Iron Man suit, he's helping to save the world, but he still loves pussy, booze and the spotlight! He just shifts his moral compass.
Robert Downey Jr's Tony Stark is a badass to begin with. He's not Toby Hall's Peter Parker, whose portrayal is seriously lacking the sharp wit and biting sarcasm the character deserves, leaving one with the impression that Spider Man is a boy scout. If you're over the age of... you know... twelve, you should appreciate that.
There's so many littl
e touches to Iron Man that are so well done. I love the way the US military is portrayed as a bunch of guys with rifles mounted onto their eighteen-foot erections. I love the fact that the Stark Industries logo is basically the Lockheed-Martin logo. The "how Stark's empire was built" media montage at the awards ceremony was put to
gether so well. Stan Lee's cameo got a chuckle out of everyone in the audience who knew who Stan Lee was. Even the little scene with Jim Cramer (professional douchebag) was charming in context.
Two complaints:
First, Gwyneth Paltrow... eww. If you're going to craft the Chloe character, then just cast Chloe.
For everyone else: Iron Man succeeds where so many other superhero movies fail. I expect the action sequences of any superhero movie to kick ass, and they do in Iron Man, what I worry about is that 1/3rd of the movie where they build the character and show how the superhero gains his powers, and that's one of the two things that makes Iron Man so strong.
There's really no Iron Man "persona" which is awesome. Iron Man is Tony Stark is Iron Man. He puts on his suit, and kicks ass, but he's still Tony. The transformation of the character IS the transformation of Tony Stark. Therein lies the second part of Iron Man that I loved so much.
At the beginning of the movie, Tony Stark isn't a hero, he's not even an anti-hero. He's a brilliant, rich guy who likes pussy, booze and the spotlight, all while holding onto his self-appointed moral ambiguity for dear life. By the end of the movie, Tony's got the Iron Man suit, he's helping to save the world, but he still loves pussy, booze and the spotlight! He just shifts his moral compass.
Robert Downey Jr's Tony Stark is a badass to begin with. He's not Toby Hall's Peter Parker, whose portrayal is seriously lacking the sharp wit and biting sarcasm the character deserves, leaving one with the impression that Spider Man is a boy scout. If you're over the age of... you know... twelve, you should appreciate that.
There's so many littl
e touches to Iron Man that are so well done. I love the way the US military is portrayed as a bunch of guys with rifles mounted onto their eighteen-foot erections. I love the fact that the Stark Industries logo is basically the Lockheed-Martin logo. The "how Stark's empire was built" media montage at the awards ceremony was put together so well. Stan Lee's cameo got a chuckle out of everyone in the audience who knew who Stan Lee was. Even the little scene with Jim Cramer (professional douchebag) was charming in context.Two complaints:
First, Gwyneth Paltrow... eww. If you're going to craft the Chloe character, then just cast Chloe.
That's a nitpick. My second problem is not.
There's two groups of bad guys, or, maybe more accurately, a bad guy and a group of bad guys. Your group of bad guys is "ambiguous mass of brown people" who may be the LEAST convincing group of bad guys ever. I KNOW it's a comic book, but come on. I'm not going to be scared just cause they're sorta-Arab, and sorta-Eastern European, but based on how much these guys emulate the Keystone Cops you'd almost think that's what the producers were banking on. Who knows, given American sentiments, maybe that works for the majority of the people that are going to see this movie, but for fucks sakes THEY LET TONY BUILD THE SUIT IN THEIR CAVE!
White-corporate bad guy plays his role almost to perfection, but I wish they'd have made him just a bit more evil. Still, I understand why it was done to better fit the comic book theme.
So, yeah, go. Unless Narnia or Indiana Jones pulls a shocker it will be the best "summer blockbuster" until Dark Knight.
So, yeah, go. Unless Narnia or Indiana Jones pulls a shocker it will be the best "summer blockbuster" until Dark Knight.
Friday, May 2, 2008
INDUSTRIO!
Cubans can now purchase computers. How wonderful. I should move to Havana now with all the sweet communist luxuries they have now. Get myself a steady government controlled job that pays me $19.50 a month (thats a real statistic). In this article they go on to explain that this computer goes for $780. It is a tower style QTECH PC and regular tube monitor. They are equipped with an Intel Celeron processor with 80 gigs of memory and 512 RAM, and run a Windows XP operating system. First off, can't you get a computer twice as good as that for less here in the states? Secondly, and stop me if I'm wrong here, but aren't those American parts? Isn't that against that little trade embargo thingy? Eh, whatever. The last quote in the article, you know the one that's suppose to be all deep and emotional and stuff, said "Hotels, cell phones, DVD, Cuba is changing a lot." ...Alright! Its like some sort of awesome time warp. In Cuba right now its 1987. So like I said, I'm going to Cuba so I can use cell phones and watch Miami Vice! Oh wait, I can do that here? God, I love America. And Miami Vice.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Free Floating Thoughts For The 55 And Older Crowd
Alright, old people, I don't like you, and you don't like me, so, I've come up with an idea that will help keep you out of my life, and vice versa.
Here's what I propose:
There's 55 and older communities, AARP, WGN radio, CBS TV... why not give the golden generation its own store? Call it... "The Old People Store" or... "Walgreens."
1) Start with a general pharmacy, but sell EVERYTHING old people need. Depends, Centrum, bingo stamps, suspenders, over-your-regular-glasses sunglasses
2)Make the place a fully functioning post office and bank
3) Staff the entire place with other seniors
4) Attach the thing to a Target, but rename it Woolworths or Goldblatts
5) All in store announcements to be made by Wally Phillips
6) Have the government subsidize it by using a percentage of the amount allotted to social security so everything inside costs what it did in 1956
7) Store hours: 4:30am-2:00pm
8) Make the print on everything HUGE
9) Staff every store with at least 3-4 psychologists specially trained to hear complaints on taxes, the government, rap music, hot weather, cold weather, humid weather, dry weather, hurricane weather, non-hurricane weather, meteorites-falling-on-your-car weather, young people, "hot-dogging" athletes, whores (pronounced Hooo-ers,) "the computer," and cable television
10) Weekly Mahjong and pinochle tournaments, and rascal scooter races
11) Penny candy and a soda fountain
12) WIDE parking spaces in the lot
13) All stores will be built "across the street from the old service station"
I think that's a good start.
Here's what I propose:
There's 55 and older communities, AARP, WGN radio, CBS TV... why not give the golden generation its own store? Call it... "The Old People Store" or... "Walgreens."
1) Start with a general pharmacy, but sell EVERYTHING old people need. Depends, Centrum, bingo stamps, suspenders, over-your-regular-glasses sunglasses
2)Make the place a fully functioning post office and bank
3) Staff the entire place with other seniors
4) Attach the thing to a Target, but rename it Woolworths or Goldblatts
5) All in store announcements to be made by Wally Phillips
6) Have the government subsidize it by using a percentage of the amount allotted to social security so everything inside costs what it did in 1956
7) Store hours: 4:30am-2:00pm
8) Make the print on everything HUGE
9) Staff every store with at least 3-4 psychologists specially trained to hear complaints on taxes, the government, rap music, hot weather, cold weather, humid weather, dry weather, hurricane weather, non-hurricane weather, meteorites-falling-on-your-car weather, young people, "hot-dogging" athletes, whores (pronounced Hooo-ers,) "the computer," and cable television
10) Weekly Mahjong and pinochle tournaments, and rascal scooter races
11) Penny candy and a soda fountain
12) WIDE parking spaces in the lot
13) All stores will be built "across the street from the old service station"
I think that's a good start.
BOYCOTT GAS MAY 2ND!!!
Bullshit.Boycott, n. - the doing without of something, with the renunciation of the boycotted product held up as tangible proof to those who supply the commodity that consumers are prepared to do without it unless changes are made
This "Gas Boycott" calls for EVERYONE to not buy gas on May 2nd. It doesn't actually mean we're using less gas, so prices will stay the same.
"Yea, but at least oil companies will know we're upset." Hey, guess what, even if they do know you're upset... they don't give a shit. To an average American, gas is like oxygen; we wouldn't be able to do many of the normal things in our daily lives without it.
So hey, don't forget!! Boycott gas on May 2nd and make May 3rd the busiest gas day ever!
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